January 15, 2008

America Needs a Third Party

Every four years I find myself wondering why America still has an archaic two-party political system. Oh, sure, we've technically got a number of third parties. So few people ever vote for them, though, that we've developed a prevalent self-perpetuating idea that voting for a third party candidate is throwing one's vote away. By not saying much of anything of substance and by never keeping their promises, the two major parties can attach themselves to whatever notions become popular. "Republican" and "Democrat" are words that have no fixed meaning. By contrast, third parties tend to be focused on very narrow sets of issues and so appeal, at best, to one-issue voters.

However, here's a prospective third party that I think we can all support:

Everyone loves a sunny town. Don't you want it to be sunny in your town?

Hardly anyone opposes erections. I've never heard or read of anyone advancing that our nation would be a better place if impotence were more widespread.

All Americans like nice weather and sexual arousal unless they're Islamo-Fascists or Communists. The Republicans and Democrats have failed to deliver on either of these fronts. It's time for them to go.

Vote Sunny Town Erection Party in 2008!

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