August 28, 2008

Crucified Frog Has Papal Panties in a Twist

According to the old man in the dress who sits atop the biggest hoard of treasure on the planet, the above sculpture by German artist Martin Kippenberger (1953-1997) "has offended the religious feelings of many people who consider the cross a symbol of God's love and of our redemption."

Yeah, so what? You find "Zuerst die Fuesse" offensive, so here's a thought... don't look at it. Wow, what a concept! Imagine that. If you don't like it, don't look at it. Personally, I wouldn't want it in my house for purely aesthetic reasons. In fact, the artist meant it to be repulsive. The thing is, it's not in my house and it's not in the Pope's house, either. It's in an art museum.

You know what I find offensive, though?

I find a feudalistic patriarchy that tries to convince people that using condoms doesn't prevent the transmission of potentially lethal sexually-transmitted diseases terrifically offensive.

I find a man who wears designer clothing worth millions of dollars to visit overpopulated, under-resourced, impoverished countries while presuming to tell the people there how to live good lives offensive as well as ludicrous. It's even more risible that anyone listens to the hollow-eyed old celibate.

I find it offensive that this same pointy-hatted old fart doesn't speak out against bellicose buffoons like William Donohue when he calls for violence against the infidels. As far as I'm concerned, that's supporting it. Considering his voluntary service to the Hitler-Jugend and later as an anti-aircraft guard in the Third Reich's military, though, I can't say it entirely surprises me.

I find it offensive that we have to bow and scrape and condition our culture to avoid bruising the sensibilities of idiots who still believe in evil spirits. These backwards witch doctors also think that yoga and reading horoscopes lets demons take people over, for crying out loud. I would assume they find the notion of people being possessed offensive, too. Shall we then disallow the practice of yoga and the printing of horoscopes in order to avoid making Pope Palpatine soil himself? As much as I would like to see people stop believing in nonsense of all kinds, I wouldn't advocate preventing them from doing so by such means. They can believe whatever they want and I can point out how silly I find it. Apparently, that's not enough for Il Papa and his minions.

Because, after all, they're a bunch of douchebags who have managed to parasitize decent society for the last few centuries and make good on the PR front by tossing back a few crumbs. Except, of course, when they're shuffling their footmen to new posts to avoid having them stand deserved criminal charges for doing things that any thinking person finds truly and deeply offensive.

If Jesus and Jehovah have problems with Kippenberger's self-effacing sculpture, let them come and take it away. If they can't do it for themselves, then who cares what a bunch of their supplicants think? They're too dense to figure out that they've thrown their lots in with a losing team in the first place. Sometimes being offended is the best way to be shaken out of one's stupidity... and make sure that priests and popes and cardinals have to find useful employment, too.

Any deity that needs the protection of its followers is not worthy of worship.


A billion kudos to the board of Museion of Bolzano, Italy for their refusing to remove the work based on the objections of an old troll in a nightgown and his sycophants.

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