Jesus on a Motorbike: Sheep on Drugs Prophecy Fulfilled
Gather 'round, kids, and let me tell you of the prophecy of Reverend X, the man who could see the future.
Many years ago, in the early 90's, Reverend X penned the following lyrics for a song called Motorbike:
Me 'n baby Jesus, we take a trip and hold on tightHow do I know that Reverend X was a True Prophet®? Simple! Because Jesus on a motorbike has finally showed up... and you can buy him!
Me 'n baby Jesus, we take a trip and ride...
Jesus on a motorbike.
A company called Fishermen has put out a line of Jesus action figures. These aren't your ordinary talking Jesus action figures, though. We're talking extreme Jesus here. Jesus as open-road biker, his white cloak blowing in the wind behind him, the photo accompanied by the words "I am freedom." Jesus the rock-climber. Jesus the surfer. This is Jesus-as-action hero, cast in plastic and ready for delivery.
I ask you, how could Sheep on Drugs have known what was coming well over a decade ago?
Surely, Rex X knew the future! Was it not he who saidSuffer little children in your skyscraper hellYea and verily.
On crack cocaine
Force fed on fear and failure...
Well, now all the suffering little children can get themselves an action Jesus and everything is gonna be just fine. Surely, the sight of Jesus on a skateboard is enough to inspire anyone to... errrr... dress up funny and ride around on a skateboard. Look... he doesn't even have holes in hands anymore. And best of all, Jesus is as white as white can be. There's not a trace of Middle Eastern ancestry in that visage, nosir.
He's a proper Anglo, most likely an Englishman, just like it says in the Bible. Everyone in the trailer park will envy you when you show off DA LAWD on urethane wheels! What more could you possibly want?You must buy a plastic action Jesus on a Motorbike! The Reverend X commands you!
