May 01, 2008

On This National Day of Prayer

As you may know if you live in the United States, and might be surprised to find out if you live elsewhere, today is our National Day of Prayer. Today, we Americans stop for a moment, bow our heads, and offer up a prayer to the divine that our fondest wishes might be granted without our having to do anything else. We Americans are a favored race, you see, and even if what we want might do some damage to all you people in those inferior countries that the divine has created in order that we might be better served, we get our way because the divine likes us best. We're very grateful people, we Americans, because we're the Shining City on the Hill. Not you, us. So we pray to give thanks for being the Chosen People, too.

In light of that, I thought I'd put a little prayer in my blog today.

Oh Holy Ghost of Norman Fell
Who maketh the price of gas to increase,
please increase the price of gas some more.
In Roper's mansion there are many apartments
and if we cannot afford to drive we shall dwell in them forever.
Yay! Though I must walk to the tavern of the Regal Beagle,
I shall fear no Furley.
Thy plunger and thy keyring shall comfort me
All the days of my life.
By the Tripper, the Snow and the Wood,
Ah, Larry.

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